A Fun, Feminist, London Pub Wedding!

…with handfasting and an Eminem quote!

I was so excited to be booked as the celebrant for Danielle and Ian’s wedding at the Depot N7. London Pub weddings are always right up my street, cool, relaxed and effortlessly fun.

I love it when my first chat with a couple includes the phrase ‘smash the patriarchy’ and I get to show off my ‘Nevertheless She Persisted’ tattoo! From our first intro call, I knew we were going to create a wedding ceremony that was warm, joyful and had equality, feminist values and true love at its heart.

Danielle and Ian had done the ‘legal bit’ during covid restrictions and now wanted a spring wedding in a London Pub that would be filled with love, fun, friends and family. They chose a city wedding for lots of practical reasons, but also because it reflected where they had built their home.

A Modern London Wedding at The Depot N7 London.

Weddings at the Depot N7 always have a really great relaxed, laidback atmosphere. The space is really flexible, and you can even have your humanist wedding ceremony outside in their courtyard.

Danielle and Ian chose to have a humanist wedding ceremony because they wanted a wedding that reflected them and their relationship. A modern, city wedding that felt familiar to guests, but which only included traditions that felt right to them and that had meaning. Choosing to have a celebrant-led unique wedding ceremony doesn’t mean you can’t choose to have traditional elements. Also wanting a feminist wedding doesn’t mean you can’t choose to be supported or accompanied down the aisle by an important man in your life. The difference, is the intention, choosing to celebrate someone’s role as a support in your life by having them support you in that moment can be a beautiful thing. It’s very different in its meaning to being ‘given away’ or ‘handed over’ as property – no thank you!

A Feminist Wedding with a nod to Wedding Traditions

With that in mind Danielle chose to celebrate the love and support she’d received from her Stepfather and asked him to joyously dance her down the aisle to meet Ian, it was a beautiful, warm-hearted moment that was about love – not patriarchy!

Equally, Danielle and Ian exchanged rings as a physical reminder of the love they share, the promises made and the partnership they have built. This symbolism is so much more meaningful in a modern wedding to the idea of a ring as a symbol of ownership.

A Heartfelt Wedding with a sprinkling of humour… and Eminem!

Although this London Pub wedding ceremony was going to incorporate some traditional elements, Danielle and Ian wanted to make sure that it was still a modern wedding ceremony, completely personalised to them. As I got to know Danielle and Ian, I really got to understand their sense of humour, their delight in a sprinkling of silliness, their real love for each other and their shared love of Eminem!

This led to me suggesting that we hide a little wedding easter egg in the ceremony – it was a Spring wedding after all – and hidden in my words about the importance of seizing the opportunity for happiness, were the opening lines from ‘Lose Yourself’ which raised a laugh among the guests who spotted it!

Personal wedding vows shared after a game of tag!

It’s really important to know that there is never any pressure to include anything ‘creative, alternative or out of the ordinary’ in a humanist wedding ceremony. The whole point of a celebrant ceremony is that it feels completely right to you and that it fits how you feel and who you are. Whenever I create a ceremony that has something ‘a bit out there’ it’s because it completely reflects the couple, their story, their values, and their love.

So it was with Danielle and Ian in their fun-filled wedding on that gorgeous Springtime London day! It became very clear as I grew to know both Danielle & Ian that they absolutely revelled in a sense of silliness and fun in their relationship, and they wanted that same atmosphere of joy and laughter in their unique wedding ceremony.

Danielle & Ian couldn’t decide who would say their vows first, and during the course of getting to know them, I discovered that they love playing ‘tag-you’re it’ every time they go on holiday. It became clear that the only way to decide who made their promises first, was a game of tag, with the winner deciding! It was silly, joyful and 100% authentic to them! (by the way, Danielle won!)

A Handfasting celebrating their Celtic heritage

As well as lighthearted moments in their wedding ceremony. Danielle and Ian wanted to have some really sincere wedding moments that reflected their shared Irish heritage and celebrated their families coming together. As well as a lighthearted, heartfelt tone to their wedding ceremony. Danielle and Ian wanted to have some really sincere wedding moments that reflected their shared Irish heritage and celebrated their families coming together.

Handfasting is a Celtic wedding ritual that is perfect for couples planning a wedding where they want to involve family or friends. A handfasting ceremony includes different ribbons, cords or lengths of fabric being draped over and then wrapped around the couple’s hands before the couple themselves ‘tie-the knot’! – which is where that famous wedding saying came from!

Handfasting is also perfect for couples who want to celebrate the equity between them as partners and show that they are joining together with intention. Its origins were always about a couple showing they were choosing to marry of their own freewill. The real beauty of handfasting is that it’s about you tying your own knot! It’s about two individuals freely and openly deciding to share their love and their life together an demonstrating that with the people they hold most dear.

As with a celebrant-led wedding ceremony, your own words and actions are enough to declare their intention to build a life together. They aren’t reliant on outside forces to give a rubber stamp. So not only is handfasting a beautiful visual ritual for your ceremony, and a wonderful way to involve some of those you love, it’s also a small and perfectly formed act of rebellion!

Have you thought about including handfasting in your personal wedding ceremony?

A personal wedding ceremony that’s 100% You!

If you are planning a wedding that is filled with personal touches and want a unique wedding ceremony that celebrates you both, a wedding reflecting your quirks, passions, families that’s heartfelt, with just a sprinkling of silliness - do say hello. I’m a London Wedding Celebrant, but I’m very happy to travel across the UK!

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